Popular Nigerian celebrity chef, Hilda Effiong Bassey, known as Hilda Baci, went deep into the details of her fractured bond with her father, Effiong Bassey Edem.
The Guinness World Record holder in a recent chat on Tea with Tay podcast, revealed that her sole grievance against her father was his sudden absence. She explained that he had been actively involved in both her and her sibling’s lives since childhood.
However, things took a different path when a major disagreement between him and her mother had a ripple effect on the children.
What truly cut deep for her was her father’s abrupt abandonment, particularly when both she and her elder brother were on the brink of completing their university studies. She couldn’t wrap her head around why he withdrew his support for their education, especially after having funded their academic journey through nursery, secondary school, and the early years of their tertiary education.
Hilda vividly remembered a heart-wrenching moment she rang up her father to talk about her school expenses. To her astonishment, he picked up the call and basically played the “I’m not your dad” card, essentially disowning her over the phone.
Initially, she held hope that the discord between her mother and father would eventually fade away, leading to a reconciliation and her father’s return. Regrettably, that reconciliation never materialized.
Hilda went on to share that her father’s abandonment served as a catalyst for her to achieve a remarkable feat. She said she spearheaded the Guinness World Record cook-a-thon, not only as a personal accomplishment but also as a way to make her father regret his actions.
Speaking about how and why her father disowned her, Hilda Baci said:
HILDA BACI: My daddy issues stem a lot from abandonment. My dad didn’t abandon me from the onset, I feel like my dad was present to an extent, he tried where he could, but then when it came down to it, you know when they say when the elephants are fighting, the ground is suffering – I think we the kids were the ground that suffered when the elephants, our parents, were fighting. So it was very much more they had issues, and then we were collateral damage for my dad. And I feel like why it’s so profound for me is more the fact that I was already in my 300-level second semester. So, if you’re to think about the stress that comes from having a child, it’s training them through primary school, secondary school, university, and then once they get out of it, if you can’t afford to send them to their masters, it’s like go and start making money for yourself. So in my opinion, we were already – at least my brother and I – we were almost out of that phase where we were constantly asking for money or anything like that, and then my dad is like “oh, I disown you”. So I pretty much still remember the conversation where I was calling my dad cuz I think it was matriculation and I was calling my dad like “you will not bring food for me this matric?” and then his response to me is “who is your dad?” So, that was when it dawned on me that my parents were having issues, and I just remember going on from that time, and as time went on, it just started to dawn on me that this man is serious oh, this is not a joke.
