Nigerian social media space was recently awash with stories of an ex-Nollywood Actor, Mr. Kenneth Aguba. Mr. Aguba, according to the stories was found homeless, malnourished and sick in Enugu by a well-meaning blogger who immediately brought the actor’s ordeal to the limelight and beckoned on Nigerians to help the out-of-job, sickly and homeless actor. The story of Aguba’s sorry condition got to the founder and General Overseer of Omega Power Ministries, Apostle Chibuzor Chinyere who decided to help to house, feed, establish and even marry for Aguba.
The story of Apostle Chibuzor’s magnanimity trilled Nigerians who praised him to the highest heavens for his decision to give some meanings to the life of the hapless Aguba. Trust Nigerian women as many of them started vying and competing for who would marry the favoured homeless star. Many videos of pretty and young ladies confessing their love for Mr. Aguba circulated online and everybody held their breath waiting for the favoured to identify his bride.
However, much to everybody’s surprise and chagrin, especially to the disappointment of the Good-Samaritan-Apostle who was trying to help, the ex-Nollywood Star rejected all the women recommended to him here in Nigeria and vehemently declared that he wants to marry a virgin from Israel. Mr. Aguba further clarified his demand by insisting that the virgin would not just be an Israeli, she should also come from the tribe of Judah and must be a relative of Jesus Christ.
Obviously, many people were enraged! The Apostle threatened he would send him back to where he was picked from if he didn’t want to be helped. Many Nigerians who were angered by his behavior called him ingrate and insisted that he should be grateful instead of making such irrational demands.
There were people like my humble self who simply shook our heads in pity for Mr. Aguba. We simply thought the young man was sick and needed medical attention not marriage.
Well these are opinions and they are all valid when looked at on their merits. However, there is one thing everybody seems to be missing in this Aguba’s episode and I want to draw attention to it.
Mr. Aguba’s Right to Chose
As funny as it sounds, Aguba’s wish for an Israeli’s wife communicates an important message. Although the assertion by many that he is mentally ill and needs rehabilitation should not be swept under the carpet, still his decision on whom to marry remains his exclusive right whether he is mentally stable or not. This ability to give consent, to say yes to what we want and no to what we don’t want, is at the core of our humanity. As such, that Aguba is being helped should not deprive him the freedom of choice. Aguba’s choice of an “Israeli Virgin” though very funny, shows that any kind of woman should not be imposed on him without his consent. Marriage is a serious business and should not be embraced without volition. Call it the decision of a person who needs mental help, it remains a valid decision until he is rehabilitated to the point where he can give rational consent.
Aguba’s desire of an “Israelite Virgin” echoes the importance of choice in everything in life but especially in marriage. Life is all about the choices we make. Whether as rich or poor, educated or uneducated, good looking or ugly, young or old, we cannot but stop making choices.
In as much we should appreciate all the helps and attentions Aguba is getting, on this issue of marriage, he has to decide for himself if he really wants to be married or not. While it is not out of place to help him in finding a Nigerian woman to marry, should he insist on a virgin from Israel, he should be ready himself to go to Israel and get himself a sweet Hebrew virgin. The choice and responsibilities are all his as every choice goes with responsibilities.
